THe NeW ReQUIeRMeNTS FOR BeING

A SeCURITY GUARD AT . . .

MIAMI KILLIAN SeNIOR HIGH

JUst in this Mr. Rodriguez himsel declared the new standerds for security guards at the school. . .

1. Must be slow
2. Must be cruel to students who are innocent at all times
3. Must treat the ruel breakers with respect & friendly addoration
4. Would be great if they were fat & clumsy but just optional
5. Please get the random students who mostly cooperate with the ruels into trouble and let the rule breakers go!! (mandatory!!!)

In Order To Save The Whales, We Must Breed With Them!
http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/in_order_to_save_the_whales_we
This is about breeding with the whales in order to make new whales it's pretty funny but because it's horrendous and it would be impossible!
Meth Addicts Demand Government Address Nation's Growing Spider Menace!
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/meth_addicts_demand_government
Mehth addicts are crazy sober imagine listening to to them under the influence!
Ailing Castro Begins 750,000 Last Words!
http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/ailing_castro_begins_750
Hilarios! It was talking about fidel talking and talking on his death bed because all he did when he was well was annoy and give lectures and long sermons on politics!
FEMA Calls Rebuilding Complete As New Orleans Restored To Former Squalor!
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/fema_calls_rebuilding_complete_as

SATIRE!
(lat. medley, dish of colourful fruits) is a technique used in drama and the performing arts, fiction, journalism, and occasionally in poetry, the graphic arts, and more commonly popular media. Although satire is usually witty, and often very funny, the purpose of satire is not primarily humour but criticism of an event, an individual or a group in a clever manner.
Ex:
Idiocracy- a movie which is a feel bad comady!!

If there is life on other planets, why haven’t they contacted us?
This question was answerd by explaining that aliens are as far away from us as we are from them, & they don't believe we exist just like we bearly believe that they exist. It also was answerd by critisising the person to to come up with the question.

Is time travel possible?
The answer for this question was YES, and quick quidlines for time traveling to the past and to the fututre, by stating that the important question was what to take with you.

What is the Large Hadron Collider?
This is a tunnel under france and switzerland, wich might turn into a black hole.

Which counts more: nature or nurture?
The answer was "nurture" and the author claims that "If one is looking good, one is feeling good." I believe this is true we should nurture to get what we need and be treated the same in return.

1.) Are you interested in the movie?

Well i work in Blockbuster and the movie recemtle came out , by the cover it dosn't much attract me but i could tell it was one of those criticizing type of movies like all the movies coming out now which criticize the government , and a whol bunch of other ptograms and ideas. I really don't care for this type of movie but maybe i will see it to see what all the fuss is about.

2.) Do you agree with the premise of the movie (according to the reviewer)?

Well it dosen't really matter if i do dose it , this is america and people should be allowed to write things and make movies that not all people agree on, this don't have to be agreed upon by you to be conciderd good. Hitler was a genios yet he killed millions of poeple i don't agree with what he did i even hate him for it but i can't say he wasn't smart( getting all those millions of people to agree to kill other human beings! But just for the sake of answering your question . . .
Yes, i do agree with the premiss of the movie and some things i really do believe and agree with Mike Judge on cirtain people not being allowed to breed i mean why should tow stupid people who rob banks and comit crimes have children to go into the world and make it an even more dagerous place than it is know.

3.) Are "we" getting dumber?

As a matter of fact i've always thought we were getting dumber . This is how it works . . .
we have all these things to hlep us think and make us more lazy and less quick at doing things because of our lazyness, we have so many things to do our work and thinking for us that we don't really have to use our brains as much. Lazyness is giving us slower thinking processes and a dependency on computers and machines. In the United States it shows that less and less people are not becoming engineers and in china millions are engineers each day that's why so many inventions and special equipment is coming from china.

Questions on cyber-bullying!

1)What is cyber-bullying?

Cyber-bullying is a way for unhonerable, horrible pople to get money by harrasing victims over the computer to give them money. I mean how pahtetic can people be to go and demand money over the internet! Only losers who have no life would do this!

2)What has Myspace done about it?

Myspace has done things to stop the cyber-bullying and wants to stop this ignorent desperate act to make their site safe.

3)Has a bully ever demanded you send them money via Paypal? All kidding aside, have you ever known anyone as the victim of cyber-bullying?

No a bully has never demanded that I send them money and i really don't know any one with that problem or that has ever faced it.

4)Toward the end of the article, various plans are mentioned. What's the best approach in your opinion?

The best approch is the Act that was made in North Carolina to scare the bullies over the internet.